Invest In Others

Invest in Others

Have you ever been in a crowd 

but felt surrounded by loneliness?

I think we've all been there 

 at least one time in our lives.

When I was a young girl, 

I had a 'crew' that I always hung out with.

My mother wasn't always supportive

so when we moved for High School,

I lost touch with my friends.

I always thought they had forgotten me,

that I wasn't important enough to remember,

that I wasn't important enough to write to 

(yes, letters were still the norm back then)

that I wasn't important enough to call. 

It wasn't the case, but I didn't know it then.

A young girl's mind can totally

warp the truth.

Who am I kidding? 

Anyone's mind, no matter the age

can warp the truth.

Adults battle being alone.

Adults battle being lonely.

Is there truly a difference?

I agree with this poster - but it took time.

I was thinking about the differences today- 

I have been growing away from

loneliness and finding 

that when I am alone - 

I am still okay.

I am also learning to turn loneliness around:

I am learning how to 

Invest in Others.

Last week I went to an event and 

I found myself withdrawing.

Standing off to the side observing, 

but not interacting.

I knew everyone there - 

and they knew me

but old habits die hard as they say.

Sitting back - quietly observing 

when in reality 

I was choosing 

to be lonely.

I was choosing

to be alone in the crowd.

My friend caught me in the act and called me out.

She and I together interacted with the group.

I learn each time how to do better

I learn about myself - I also learn about others.

It's okay to sit back and LISTEN and observe.

However, 

don't stay there forever.Get out of your comfort zone!!

We all have at least 1 thing in common.

Begin there!

I also learned from my friend something 

I've heard before: 'Be Interested'

With the holidays coming 

how are you investing in others?

Don't invest in others for your own gain

to feel important - to be SEEN.

When you invest in others 

you could gain strong friendships

you could gain confidence in crowds

you could gain a sense of purpose.

It can literally change your life!

It can also change theirs!

*DarleneBl* 

The Struggle for the Positive Outlook

The Struggle for the Positive Outlook

How many times do you struggle?

Do you ever want to quit or just give in?

I know that for some - struggle is a daily, moment by moment situation.

It is either caused by their own choices

or impacted by others choices.

Like my previous post about the 'Ripple Effect' - 

struggles are hard to ignore.

When you are faced with an uphill battle - 

I bet we've all related to this feeling:

 

From a scientific standpoint - 

if we don't keep pushing that boulder uphill and maintain control - 

it will come towards us 

and crush us under it's weight.

How do you find yourself

not giving in to the

 struggle?

How do you not feel like every day is a 

fight?

Have you ever realized that what you focus on 

the most is usually what will happen?  

If you focus on NOT getting a specific task accomplished - 

you will NOT accomplish it.

If you focus on what you DO want to accomplish,

you will likely successfully get it done.

Can the same be applied to your thought process?

Norman Vincent Peale said this:

" Believe you are defeated, believe it long enough, and it is likely to become a fact."

In Norman Vincent Peale's book 

'The Power of Positive Thinking' - 

his concept was that 

we ALL have the power 

to change how we think. 

When we feed positive thoughts in - 

we eventually will look at our situations, 

our trials, our struggles 

in a more positive 

light 

with a positive 

outcome.

The definition of positive  

in this reference:

Full of hope and confidence, or giving cause for hope and confidence; a positive attitude;

Certain and without any doubt.

Doubt?  Can doubt exist in a positive mind?

Yes, I think that it can!

How?

Because when you doubt - 

you question - 

you strive for a deeper answer 

or solution.

You GROW!

Will every day be positive?

Will you be able to be strong 

when you want to quit?

I cannot answer these questions for you!

Only YOU have the POWER

 to be POSITIVE

However, on a lighter note,

I believe that

Dr Suess 

has the answer:

DarleneBl

Follow me on Facebook

Visit my Home Club 

2803In

Ripple Effect

Ripple Effect

Have you ever thought about the impact you have on yourself, others or the universe?

Think about when you went fishing as a kid.

Did you ever skip rocks?

The better you threw, the more it skipped right?

What about the fish that was surfacing?

The bigger the fish, the larger the ripple would appear, right?

I woke up this morning with this thought on my head, 

I am writing this blog before I even get ready for the morning - before I lose my thought about it.

Our problems -

don't they also have a ripple effect?

If we keep them to ourselves and they eat at us - 

that ripple inside grows and grows.

If we share them with others, 

our own ripple lessens 
because we've shared the burden.

What if that person that you shared with is 

already dealing with their own ripple effect.

You drop your rock into the middle of their problems

they either carry the burden, 

or yours also weighs them down.

However - what if you create a ripple effect of....
kindness
understanding
positive influence
joyfulness

Basically create a positive
ripple effect.

Negativity can destroy you 
and those you encounter
 and those you hope to reach out to.

Thinking along these lines, I did a search about ripple affect and others....

What about Teachers? Ripple Effect - Teachers 

What about Parents? Ripple Effect - Parents 

What about Others? Ripple Effect - Everyone 

After looking up this theory of the Ripple Effect, 

I realize that it's not a new concept.  

It's quite a study: Happiness In the World - Rippling Effect

Ripple effect

A ripple effect is a situation in which ripples expand across the water when an object is dropped into it, an effect from an initial state can be followed outwards incrementally. Examples can be found in economics where an individual's reduction in spending reduces the incomes of others and their ability to spend.

Friends With History

Friends with History

Today I ran into a couple of friends and their family.

It had been awhile since we'd seen one another.

We all picked up where we'd left off.

It spoke to the soul - 

and the timing was...
perfect!!

This particular friendship 

is what I call 

"Friends with History"

We met many years ago while stationed in the military 
on Oahu, HI.

This friend and I were actually standing in line at a church luncheon 

and we started talking.

We found out that my first name is her middle name.

We found out that we were both from small towns 
only about 10 miles apart.

A common thread started being woven into our lives 
at that moment.

We have always found ways to chat - 

ways to laugh and cry together -

Ways to pray together for one another -

and we have always had a bond 

that hasn't been broken....

with distance

with time

with experiences.

Several times through the years,

this family and I have separated.

God always brought us back together -
always with perfect timing!

One lunch we shared many years ago, 

she told me that it was so great to have 

'a friend with history'

This is what that means to us:

We pick up where we left off - 

no matter the time or distance in between.

We know one another's stories - 

and enjoy our common threads.

We don't have to fret 
that we won't 'get' the other.

So, when you need someone

find a person who can share your history...

 who can share your fears and your tears...

who can share your life and your strife....

who can lift you up when you're down....

who can shed light in the darkness.........

and who will say;

'How can I pray for you my dear?'

Those kinds of friends

Are Diamonds!!

Dedicated to Jilli, Pete and their family

<3 <3 <3

Open the Garage Door!

Open the Garage Door!!

I know, you're seeing a picture of a garage door, 

and I am telling you to open it!

I imagine you are pretty confused at the moment.

Let me explain!

Last weekend, I attended a women's conference. 

It was the first year for this particular one - 

the usual ladies had retired from a 20 year run 

and they passed the gauntlet 

to the next generation 

to move forward.

It was both a lonely and fulfilling time. 

One story really stood out to me and 

I've been working through it ever since.

One speaker told a story that puts the garage door analogy 

more fully into the light.

Her friend's husband had lost his mother - and although they'd cleared out the house fairly easily, 

he avoided the garage at all costs 

and made excuses not to tackle that project.

Let me pause a moment and see if you saw what I did.  

How many people have a neat, everything in it's place garage?  

When you open the door, do you just groan 

and want to close it and walk away 

until you really have to deal with it?  

That's kind of what was described about this situation.

So, his wife thought of a great idea.  

She told her husband that why don't they go over to the house, 

open the garage door 

and close it right back up 

- you know, baby steps.

He agreed and they did that.  

Well, when the garage door was opened, 

and the light shined in on the boxes inside - 

it really wasn't as big a deal 

as he'd made it to be in his head. 

The boxes of his mother's things 

and probably some of his own 

weren't quite so bad to deal with.

So, after that, they got everything cleaned out 

in less than a day and the project was finished.  

Since then, anytime they as a couple or family 

had to face anything 

they said 'Open the Garage' - 

let's get it over with and deal with it!

Since last weekend - 

I've realized that many times 

I've avoided something because in my head - 

I'd made it much bigger than it needed to be.  

When I instead approached it head on - 

shed some light into the situation - 

it really wasn't all that bad after all.

I saw this diagram meme 

and it pretty much explains 

how we should should solve problems:

I noticed that 'avoidance' 

is not in there! 

Imagine that!

So, the next time you have to face a difficult situation, 

decision or person - 

Open the Garage Door!

Shed light into the situation 

and you'll get it taken care of 

in no time at all!!

 Follow Me on Facebook:

Healthy Living Online Shop

Photography Prints

Reason, Season or a Lifetime?

Relationship lessons are sometimes hard to learn.

Especially the ones regarding friendships.

You are always going to find a lesson in each. Their friendship will either be one of three:  

A Reason ~~ A Season ~~or A Lifetime.

Which lesson are you needing to learn?

Finding those who are like 'roots' - they are the ones you need to hold onto!

I have several really great friends. 

We don't all live in the same town and a few not even in the same country.

I recently had a friendship dissolve after many years together.

We no longer communicated the same - and there was a great hurt there that had to be healed.  

I finally had to accept the apology that I would never have 

and moved on.

I call her my 'Reason' friend.

There are also those you meet - 

that no matter what you do - 

you are just never meant to be long term.

Maybe this person comes along during a time of need and fills that 'gap' you needed filled.  After a time though, 

you drift apart.

Memories may still linger, 

but you are no longer 

in one another's lives.

That is your 'Season' friendship.

I do have one friend however, 

that I met with today for only a 

short period.

She was 'passing through' town - 

and we only had time to have 

about an hour together. 

Our times have always so precious 

for the both of us.

We met years ago when we both were educating our kids - and we wanted someone to attend an out of town conference with.

We met beforehand and immediately 

we knew we'd 

be 

'lifetime friends'.

Many times we've called one another during dark periods in our lives -

 and we never looked at the clock - 

we were just there for one another.

Many times she's called on me and I listened, advised or comforted.

She has done the very same for me!

Our hearts are connected always!

I call her my 'Lifetime' friend <3

This poem describes exactly what I mean:

Reason, Season, Lifetime (Poem)

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

When you figure out which one it is,

you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,

it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.

They have come to assist you through a difficulty;

to provide you with guidance and support;

to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.

They may seem like a godsend, and they are.

They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,

this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.

Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.

Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.

What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.

The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,

because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.

They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.

They may teach you something you have never done.

They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.

Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;

things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.

Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,

and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

— Unknown

Another great 'teacher' is the famed Madea

 Let Them Go!

I love this picture of the 4 trees

 - showing the four seasons.

Our lives and the interactions we have with others many times will be just seasons.

However, like Madea said - when you find the ones with deep roots - 

hang on to those people!

Be blessed and enjoy all the

Reasons, Seasons and Lifetime 

friendships and relationships!

~~DarleneBl~~